CARMELITE SAINT OF THE DAY

SAINT JOHN OF THE CROSS

December 14

Photo: R. Massaro (C)2017 Spirit Singing

A Poem by St. John of the Cross

The Soul That Suffers With Longing to See God

I no longer live within myself 

and I cannot live without God,

for having neither him nor

myself

what will life be?

It will be a thousand deaths,

longing for my true life

and dying because I do not die.

This life that I live

is no life at all,

and so I die continually

until I live with you;

hear me, my God:

I do not desire this life,

I am dying because I do not die.

When I am away from you

what life can I have

except to endure

the bitterest death known?

I pity myself,

for I go on and on living,

dying because I do not die.

A fish that leaves the water

has this relief:

the dying it endures

ends at last in death.

What death can equal my pitiable life?

For the longer I live, the more

drawn out is my dying.

When I try to find relief

seeing you in the Sacrament,

I find this greater sorrow:

I cannot enjoy you wholly.

All things are affliction

since I do not see you as I desire,

and I die because I do not die.

And if I rejoice, Lord,

in the hope of seeing you,

yet seeing I can lose you

doubles my sorrow.

Living in such fear

and hoping as I hope,

I die because I do not die.

Lift me from this death,

my God, and give me life;

do not hold me bound

with these bonds so strong;

see how I long to see you;

my wretchedness is so complete

that I die because I do not die.

I will cry out for death

and mourn my living

while I am held here

for my sins.

O my God, when will it be

that I can truly say:

now I live because I do not die?

Peace be with you!

Rosemarie, OCDS